안녕하세요~!
내 블로그에 오신걸 환영합니다 ;P
in the past , you afraid i will leave you . but in th end , is you leave me ... i know my attitude sucks . you given me alot of chances le . but because i care too much ... hais . now say what also no use le . no matter what i said , or what i do . you wont believe ...
22may is your birthday , is also th day our baby died . i told you . but you dont believe . you dont care . you dont even replied my text . why i have to face this alone ? why ? its too torturing . who can i tell to ? what can i do ? i am getting more and more pessimistic each day . keep thinking that its all lies . still continue smoke , drink coke , eat spicy things . hack care what th doc said . didnt even want to go back scan my body . dun even want to spend th money to do operation , take out th baby . keep hurting my body everyday . make myself suffer everyday .
3months and 20days has pass . and i am still missing you , loving you , wanting you back . but you ? you are happily enjoying life w all your friends ...
why must i suffer all this alone . why ? i got alot of bad thinking . i xiang make you suffer twice th pain i suffer . i xiang kill myself so that my mom will blame you . i xiang make you guilty for life . but i she bu de . i see you sad , i will be more sad . i see you happy , i sad nvm ..
huosheng , i really need you now ...
my moodswing is getting more and more worst . same goes to my appetite . th cramps is getting more and more pain . even pain killers also have no effect . i am getting weaker and weaker . stand for 5minutes jiu buay tarhan le . and i need alot of sleep . keep getting tired easily . i hate my life ttm ! somebody can you please kill me ?!?!
i really wish i can move house to east area . w all my ite friends . only being w them i feel happy , cause they dk my past . knowing them , being w them is like having a new self . having a new life . not like in bp , everyone know my past . know my everything . bad de good de also have . and judge by th past . wont believe ppl will change when they grow older . just like him , i nv lied to him before , but whatever i said , he thinks that i am lying .
JASMINE TAN JIE MIN ! i really hate you ttm !!!
